You see it. There they all are gathered around the big dining table eating and laughing and having a great time with extended family. You think to yourself, “I wish my life was like that.” We may know it in reality and yet sometimes we need a reminder, “Life is not a TV show.”
It’s that time of year again when some TV shows return and some new ones have arrived. Some from previous years may have been canceled or finished their run so now there are similar new ones that have replaced those.
What comes up for you?
Does it bother you when others are talking about a certain favorite TV show when for you it actually irritates you or maybe makes you sad to see all the family stuff on there? What emotions arise when you see that? What is the first thing that comes to mind with your particular situation with family conflict?
Most people have never had the typical ‘Norman Rockwell’ picturesque family life however, most have at least had gatherings and celebrations to attend. Do you focus on what you don’t have with family members that seems like others have?
Look closer at what you have created
Who do you have in your life right now? What roles do the people in your life play for you? At work, are there people that you confide in and that support you during challenging times? What about friendships? Are there close friends that have been there for you during those periods of up and down or may have at least tried to be there for you?
Estrangement doesn’t have to mean that you don’t have ‘family’ around you. Quite possibly you have created your own sense of family with people who really get you and see the good that you have to offer. Take a closer look at those people around you and ALLOW them to share with you how important you are in their life.
Give them a chance
One small example: In the past, I had always equated Sundays as ‘family day’ and would never dream of asking my friends to spend time with me during that day. My thought was that I was being respectful of their family time and didn’t want to intrude.
I decided to change that. I made an offer with no pressure for a gathering at my home and found out that many were more than happy to be a part of my life ANY day of the week!
Life is not a TV show
So…no, my life is nothing like a TV show, and yet it suits me better than just fine. It is SPECTACULAR! Watching my various friends meet each other for the first time and then explain how they each had met me and what it is that they love about me was so heart warming to me. It may have not been ‘blood’ family and that’s okay with me because these people who I call my family CHOSE to love me for who I am. There was no obligation to be here with me.
Now that’s a love I have learned to welcome with open arms!
What are your feelings or thoughts when it comes to watching the family shows on TV? Do you avoid them or do you enjoy them? How do you relate them to your own personal situation? Please share in the comments below.
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Life is not a TV show – great reminder. I don’t really watch TV…too busy living the life I want to create and filling it with people and activities I enjoy. Thanks for the reminder, Elda!
I have always been more of a movie type person but not sure if I was avoiding TV because of not resonating with the shows. Thanks for the comment, Michelle!
Oh what a fun experience Elda – having your friends meet. And yay you both for taking that risk to invite them and then receiving the love they clearly were offering back. Beats any television show I’ve ever heard about!
Deborah Weber recently posted…Birds of Peace
I was definitely ‘feeling the love’ and yes…for sure, it was much better than any TV show! Thanks for the comment, Deborah.
My life for sure is nothing like a tv show and really I find more enjoyment in so many other activities. My life is amazingly beautiful and simple. I wouldn’t change it for the world!
Michelle recently posted…The Unknown Path
It’s so nice to hear you share your experience, Michelle. Thanks for the comment!
I don’t watch TV with the exception of dance shows. But here’s what came up for me after reading your post. As someone who used to have difficulty with boundaries (I’d like to think I’m getting better at it), I was also hesitant to ask people things for fear of intruding… and yes, asking them to spend time with me on the weekend was one of those things. What I’ve come to realise is that I was projecting my own hesitance to say ‘no’ on to them. Most people would say ýes’ if they had the space and the desire for whatever I’m asking and ”no’ if they didn’t. They are capable of taking care of their on boundaries. I don’t need to do it for them. What a relief!
Tat recently posted…A little bit of help can take you a long way
What an excellent perspective you have on this. Never thought of it as each person protecting their boundaries and yet I can totally see it now. Thanks for your comment, Tatiana!
You raise such a good point about Sundays and boundaries. So often we create these boundaries and it takes someone else to point that fact out. I believe you will help many with this post and am off to share.
Kelly L McKenzie recently posted…Mum Will Be 93
Thank you for sharing this post, Kelly! Am so glad to hear you had an ‘aha’ moment over my recent personal experience.
I thought you were going to mention how all family problems can be solved in half an hour including commercials. Admittedly, there’s somewhat less of that now that a lot of shows are going for season-long arcs.
SKJAM! recently posted…Book Review: The Great Secret
Thanks for making me smile Scott!